Laughable Mondays LOL

Three old guys are hanging out in the nursing home. They're old friends, and every day they sit together and shoot the breeze.
One day, Bob, the 70 year old, says "You know, I don't mind getting old. I can still play golf, flirt with the ladies - life's good! But you know what I miss? I miss peeing. Lord, I haven't had a good piss in years - I'd give anything for a good long piss!"
Fred, the 80 year old, replies: "Well Bob, life's pretty damn good for me too. But the thing I miss, is pooping. I don't think I've had a satisfying, solid shit in years. Man, I'd give almost anything for one good shit!"
Then Stan, the 90 year old, chimes in. "You guys are such wimps! Why, every morning - and I mean every morning - I take a good, long piss. Always at 9AM too - why it must be about a quart! And every morning I take a really big dump. And by big I mean big. And right on schedule, like clockwork, at 10AM....
Now... what I'd really like though, is to wake up - just once - sometime before 11AM..."



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